


The Beach Sunset

by crabtreedoug2017



Category: Original Work
Genre: Cancer, Death, Drama, F/M, Gen, Hospital, Multi, Other, Sad, Terminal Cancer, Tragedy, Transgender, cancer therapy, car crash, chemo - Freeform, if i stay ref, the fault in our stars ref
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-18
Updated: 2017-01-18
Packaged: 2018-09-18 10:42:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,254
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9381029
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crabtreedoug2017/pseuds/crabtreedoug2017





	

 

 

    “Fuck this shit,” I whispered loudly to myself as i tossed my black chest binder to the floor. Sure, being flat was nice but i wanted to say hi to that girl today without having some fucking issue trying to breathe. I buttoned up my black oxford over top of a tight fitting Calvin Klein bra. I felt really good about myself until i discovered the mop of hair on top of my head.

“Six Ten.” I muttered to myself, groggily climbing to my mirror and grabbing my pomade. When i finished with my slight mohawk i grabbed my things, slung a jacket over my shoulder and parted out the front door with a pop tart in hand.

    The engine revved and died. “Shit,” I said, hitting my steering wheel. I turned the key in the ignition again and the truck roared to life. I nodded and grabbed my cell phone, setting it to a Sleeping with Sirens station on pandora. I plugged in the auxiliary cable to the black stereo system and backed down the driveway. With each stop i gazed into space, seeing her fair face. Wishing as hard as i could that she was mine and loved me like i loved her.

*Ting-Ting* I heard over my speaker systems. She texted me this morning. Did i forget to mention she’s one of my best friends?

K- Hey dude, you’re mega late this morning, you were supposed to meet me here a whole five minutes ago!

-Heh, sorry Kiyarah, i’ll be there in less than two, just hold tight

K- *sigh* kaaaaaaaaay....

I smiled and set down my phone. All i could do was scream as a semi darted in front of me.

    Then my world went black.

 

  

Chapter 1:

    “Wake up Josh! Don’t just lay there please get up!” Was all i could hear beyond the beeping. But the sounds faded in and out.

    “Will she wake up soon?” My mom asked the doctor. He gave her a sideways and confused gaze.

“She?” He asked questionably. And looked at the bloodwork papers in his hand. “Oh…” He whispered to himself. “Well i don’t know Ms. Darling.” He answered quickly.

“Well do you know anything?” My mom asked rudely. He grunted and looked her in the eye. “No, i’m a doctor that has no knowledge. Ms. Darling your CHILD has a very major concussion and we also found some disturbing blood evidence. Potentially cancer and we need to keep them here, even past when they awaken. We’ll need to keep a close eye. And right now all you can do is pray that she-” And the doctor was cut off by Kiyarah pushing into the room and past security guards and nurses.

“Where is he!? Let me SEE HIM!” Kiyarah shouted as she slammed her force against the footboard. The monitor picked up speed and eyes went to me. The oxygen monitor plummeted and the heart monitor flatlined.

“Everybody out!” The cardiologist shouted, running into the room with a defibrillator setup. “He’s going into cardiac arrest!” He shouted. I stood, petrified in the doorway. “No i’m fine!”

“That’s a girl!” My mom shouted, walking through me.

She walked through me.

 

Chapter 2:

I fell to the floor. “What is this!?” I sobbed, clutching my chest. I screamed and rolled into a ball until the cardiologist walked out. Then i walked to my body. My pulse was weak, my face was bruised up, the oxygen mask covered my swollen lips and i was black and blue in nearly every visible place. I looked outside of the doorway to see Kiyarah darting past security, a pair of headphones in hand and a tear stained face. I sat on the foot of my bed, she took the chair and scooted it as close as she could.

“I was going to play you a song Josh, but for me to sing it would mean more. And even though you’re black and blue, i still love you.” She said in a singsong voice. I smiled and a single tear rolled down my cheek as i stared into her sapphire eyes and then down at my lifeless mound. Well, it seemed lifeless.

“Turn away.” She began “If you could get me a drink, of water ‘cause my lips are chapped and faded. Call my Aunt Marie. Help her gather all the things, and bury me in my favorite colors.” She began to sob. “I can’t keep singing. Baby, you got cancer.” She said weakly and she took my body’s hand. She cleared her throat, her voice still beautiful but cracking. “Now turn away

'Cause I'm awful just to see. 'Cause all my hair's abandoned all my body. Oh, my agony. Know that I will never marry. Baby, I'm just soggy from the chemo. But counting down the days to go

It just ain't living.And I just hope you know.” She broke down, a tear fell onto my wrist and she wiped it with her thumb. “The hardest part of this is leaving you.” She went to her knees and put her head on my chest. Trying to focus on my heartbeat, a sign of hope. She began sobbing harder. My heart monitor picked up a rapid beeping tone and i began to convulse. Kiyarah began hyperventilating. I ran through the hospital, begging for an answer, looking for someone who could see me. I watched everyone run in at once to my room. From afar i saw them pull me down to the surgical room. I leaned against the nurses counters yelling and shouting. But nobody could hear me.

 

Chapter 3:

Three hours had ticked by as i sat looking at a clock on the wall, and they hadn’t brought me back. And a white fog began to settle, a high pitched, piercing noise reached my ears.

“No! No! Bring me back! Give me another chance! Don’t do this, bring me back! Not yet, let me live longer, GOD LET ME LIVE LONGER!” I was flooded with visions of the past, my whole life up until the crash, i felt like i was falling into an abyss of darkness until i saw black.

    Light flooded back as i awoke with my whole body in pain. A bandage covered my head and i stared at a broken, yet beautiful girl above me. Her colorful hair messily falling around her face. “Oh my god Joshie!” She shouted sobbing, i gave a weak smile. I felt my stomach heave and all i could do was weakly say bucket before my bile spilled from my lips, painfully. “Nurse! We need a nurse!” She shouted, keeping her eyes averted from my mess. I began sobbing, as my stomach continued to force everything i had.

    “We’re going to use an aggressive form of treatment.”

    “Do what you must.”

    “Joshie stay with me! Please don’t go…”

 

Chapter 4:

I opened my eyes to see my barren ceiling and tan flooring. Kiyarah lain upon the hardwood, snoozing, clutching one of my pillows, curled into a ball. “Hey.” I said, smiling. She stirred but did not awaken. I have been home for just a bit over a month, stitches in my head, they said they got it all. All of the tumors from my brain. Rapidly spreading brain cancer is what they told me i had.

“Kiki.” I whispered by her ear. She moaned gently before opening her eyes and smiling at me.

“Hey Joshie.” She said groggily, then yawned.

“Want breakfast?” I asked her. Now that i was a cancer patient on around the clock care, i was homeschooled, but she still attended the school i used to attend with her.

    I marched into the kitchen to see Alexx and his boyfriend of a year. Alexx McColloch is my cousin, he flew out from Arizona to come and see me here in Carolina. Jake was asleep on top of Alexx, they both breathed in unison, while the television played spongebob faintly. I chuckled softly as i pulled ingredients together and made a speedy batch of pancakes and eggs for Kiyarah.

“Ohhh,” She said, observing the boys on the couch and adjusting her t-shirt to fit over her large chest. I smiled and looked down at my own chest and frowned. She looked at me quickly and sighed. “You know, those things don’t make you any less man in my eyes babe.” She told me. I gave a toothy grin and flipped the last pancake onto a plate for her.

“Steamy stack of four with scrambled egg and cheese!” I whispered loudly and pecked her lips.

“Mmh,” she sighed, sitting at the round table. I walked over and pushed her chair in gently and began playing with her hair in between the kisses to the top of her head. She sighed again and began to speak once she swallowed her food. “ You know, today is Valentine's day, and i could get a day off, considering what’s happened.” she said with a smirk spreading on her face. I looked her in the eye and bit my lip gently, smiling. “Herm,” I said sarcastically and leaned over. Taking a swig of orange juice before kissing her lips roughly and biting her lip in the same manner. “Oh somebodys full of want.” She said, placing her hand at my knee and traveling up. “Mhm.” I replied, seating myself beside her, waiting for her to finish her food. I had eaten while i was cooking.

    “So you wanna…?” She asked, gently nudging me after placing her plate in the sink. I nodded. We sat in my room for the next hour, waiting for everyone to leave for school, work or the park. Of course, Alexx has to go swinging or he’ll just die. But Jake didn’t seem to mind all that much that he would chase the younger boy up and down the play structure. That’s just my cousin. My mom worked at the local target as a cashier and my dad programmed computers. There were multiple reminders to take my medications and when i needed to do chemotherapy.

Yes. Chemo. And yes, i am bald.

    “Hang on,” I said, running to the bathroom to take a small cocktail of prescription medications. I looked at myself in the mirror and began singing to myself as i cried at what i had become. “Turn away.'Cause I'm awful just to see. 'Cause all my hair's abandoned all my body. Oh, my agony. Know that I will never marry. Baby, I'm just soggy from the chemo. But counting down the days to go.It just ain't living.” I sighed and whispered as i took my last pill, “No, it just ain’t living.” I put ointment on my stitches and the last thing i saw was the blood seeping from my nose, my mouth and my eyes.

 

Chapter 5:

“He’s low on platelets, a disseminated intravascular coagulation.”

“Haha, what?” i said to the doctor, nonchalantly. She walked over to me.

“Okay, so abnormal clumps of thickened blood form inside your blood vessels. The abnormal clots use up the blood's clotting factors, which can lead to massive bleeding in other places. Causes include inflammation, infection, and cancer.” She said solemnly but quickly.

“Wait but i thought my cancer was gone.” I said, looking at her full of worry and fear. She shrugged.

“Honey,” She took my hand and my mother’s. My father sat beside me and Kiyarah hunched over the chair. “Your cancer is terminal and had reached all of your major organs and it’s not showing signs of stopping. I’m sorry.” All i could do was look into the faces in the room like it was the last time i’d see them. Wait but now she’s staring at me, Kiyarah, while everything around her falls away and i lose consciousness in the hospital bed again.

“Get the oxygen monitor!”

“Quick i need a pint of O negative! He’s losing blood!”

“Where's my nurse!?”

“Doc...just let me go.” I say standing next to him. But i know nobody can hear me. I choose to stand next to Kiyarah and lay my head on her shoulder. She stiffens and begins sobbing hysterically as she walks back and stares, at me? Her mouth remains shut but i can hear her speak.

_Josh?_

“Hey Kiki.”

_How, and can’t anyone else see you?_

“No, seems like only you can.”

_So if you die you’ll still be here, with me?_

“I think so…” She nodded and wiped her eyes. I turned back to the doctor. “Just let me go.” I said into his ear. I looked back at her and she nodded again before speaking up.

“He wants you to just let him go.” My mother stared at her with a face of fury and pain.

“How could you possibly know that? Come to that conclusion?” She shouted at Kiyarah.

“Because he just told me.”

“Get the fuck out of here, you’re some kind of nutcase for thinking a dead bloody body can speak any sense to you.”

“But he really did!”

“GET _OUT_!” Kiyarah’s eyes welled up as she ran out of the room. The fog began to settle again, and a warm feeling enveloped me. I was closer to the end this time, i was letting myself go.

“We have a heartbeat!” The doctor shouted as the fog cleared and i felt myself get swept away, back into my broken body. And i awoke.

“No. No. Let me die.” I said in a croaking voice.

“What?” My mom said, stunned.

“I wanna die.” I whispered with my eyes still shut. Pain intense as they covered my face in an oxygen mask and led me to get a CAT scan.

“It reached his lungs, he has no chance of breathing alone.”

“Then he’ll be on oxygen.”

 

 

Chapter 6:

    Just like that is how i live for now. I walk around, pulling an oxygen container. Feeling weaker by the day.

    “Happy birthday Josh.” Kiyarah whispered happily from next to me. She kissed my shoulder and sat up. She tapped my oxygen tank to see what was left. “Nearly empty babe. I’m gonna pee and then i’ll switch it out.” She told me as she stepped out of bed and strode to the bathroom wearing nothing but a pair of grey, grumpy cat panties. I grunted and began to wheeze as i pulled the last bit of air from the tank a few moments later. “Shit, Shit, Shit! I’m sorry Josh!” She shouted, changing out the tank and reconnecting my tube. I inhaled deeply as the color regained in my face. My chest cramped and burned, have you ever held your breath underwater, perhaps being held under there and feeling like you’ll drown? That’s me when i run out of oxygen for less than a minute. She kissed the side of my head.

“I’m really sorry.”

“It’s not a big deal,” I said shakily and groggily. She took my hands and assisted me to sit up, i looked at my bony, frail body. Ridden with disease. _All i am is this disease._

_I will die like this_

_It will hurt so much_

_Now all you are is skin and bones_

_Why not let go now? While you’re not in so much suffering._

“No! NO!” I shouted, punching my thighs and crying. The intense pain made me cry harder.

“Hey hey hey! Josh what are you doing?!” She screamed, taking my arms behind me, holding me to prevent myself from thrashing more. I could already see the bruises forming on my legs.

“I’m done living,” I sobbed, “Just let me go Kiyarah.”

“No. no no no no no!” She said sternly but afraid. Her grasp on my arms became a gentle hold around my waist, as she placed her head on my shoulder. “You’ll be fine Josh, we can beat this.”

I sniffled, then i sniffled again. I groaned. Another nosebleed. I covered my nose with the back of my hand and rushed to the bathroom. And i accidentally pulled my oxygen container. My lungs and chest began to sting as my bedside lamp crashed to the floor, sending shards of the glass, led bulb all over my wooden floor.

“Ah! Sorry i wasn’t paying attention.” She said, pulling the oxygen monitor towards me as i lifted the tube to my nose before realizing i filled it with blood.

“Fuck.” I croaked, feeling my stomach twist and heave, my chest burn and my vision fog. I collapsed to the floor, concking my head on the door jam of the bathroom. Blood still seeping from my nose.

 

 

Chapter 7:

Hours later it seemed, i woke up on the lap of my girlfriend, my mother petting my back and turning down the amount of oxygen being released by the tank as my eyes fluttered open. Bloody kleenex littered the kitchen table and overfilled the trash can. Above me was a pint of blood on a slow drip back into my system. A needle unprofessionally shoved into a thick vein, clouded by green and purple bruising. Kiyarah ran her fingers through my hair.

“You ok?” She whispered as calmly as she could manage.

“Mhm.” I said, blocking the intense pain in my body as best as i could. An alarm went off on my phone.

        _Take: Chemotherapy_

I showed it to my mom. Not realizing i had shattered my phone screen when i fell earlier that day. She quickly took the phone and put on a screen protector to prevent the glass from falling out. She shook her head.

“I think right now its best to not do chemo.”

“But mom its making me better!” I shouted as strongly as i possibly could.

“No. You need to stop. It’s not helping it’s making you weaker.”

“Mom!” She cut me off.

“No more chemo sessions, that is final and you need to eat, now are we feeding you the hard way or the easy way? Because i will go get that nasty chocolate shake stuff.” I buried my head into Kiyarah’s denim-covered thigh, sobbing lightly.

“I’ll eat like a normal person.” I mumbled into her leg. She smelled of Chanel and coconuts as i inhaled her scent deep into my lungs. “I love you Kiyah.” I mumbled to her, still sobbing into her leg.

“I love you too Joshie.” She said, placing her palm comfortingly onto my cheek. I rolled over, my arm still draped over the side of the couch.

“I want to be normal, i just want to be a normal boy.”

“What would make you normal babe?”

“Having more testosterone in my body, maybe even top surgery, and not having this godforsaken cancer.” I said, reddening in the face out of sheer anger.

“No, no need to get mad. I have an idea.”

“Jamie come eat.” My mom shouted, I grunted loudly.

“Ohhhh dead names ma.” I said sitting up, i looked down at my arm to see the needle, the bag nearly empty. “Maaaaaaaa I’m still on blood drip!” I shouted, feeling uneasy and slightly sick at the sight of blood in a bag. As if i hadn’t seen enough blood lately.

“Oh yea!” she shouted back, bringing my food to the livingroom. “Now baby betta not make a mess!” She said in a belittling tone. I frowned at her and put a single hand on my hip. “Oh whatever.” She scoffed playfully, standing back up to prepare more lunch for Kiyarah, Alexx and herself.

“Can i get mac ‘n cheese?!” Alexx shouted, not letting his eyes leave the screen of his monstrous gaming laptop. She groaned.

“Anyone else want that?”

“I wouldn’t mind it.” Kiyarah answered back kindly; as I leaned over and shoveled flavorless lentils into my mouth.

“Oh yUM! I love not tasting SHIT!” I said sarcastically, feeling myself hold back more tears. I continued to eat as i watched everyone chow down on macaroni and cheese. I stared longingly into their bowls of cheese covered noodle. I remembered the flavor, and all the times i ate it in the past.

 

 

Chapter 8:

“Alright, lay on this.” The doctor said, patting the long pad. It was attached to a track, pulling me into what looked like a tunnel, to scan my entire body. I sighed, tying the back of my robe so that my ass wouldn’t be revealed to the world. Well. The doctors.

“Hold your breath. Ok, now release.”

“I can’t breath!” I wheezed and began to hyperventilate.

“Hang on hang on!” The staff shouted, taking the scan and turning off the machine. Three staff members rushed over immediately hooking me up to oxygen. As they did so they commented on my pale skin, my cracking fingernails, my chapped lips, my sunken eyes. Telling me i was still a beautiful girl.

I inhaled the air deep, letting it fill my lungs and then spoke.

“I’m not a girl.” I said sternly.

“What?” Asked a petite blonde nurse dressed in fuchsia and black scrubs.

“I’m a boy.” I said in the same manner.

“No sweetie, i think the meds are messin-” I abruptly cut her off.

“No. My name is Joshua, i’m a BOY.”

“But your bloodwo-”

“No. I don’t care about my bloodwork, i was a boy born into the body of a girl. Enough of that.” I spat rudely, hopping off of the table scooting my oxygen tank and clothes into a corner before stripping off the gown and putting on my casual clothes.

 

Chapter 9:

“He only has a few weeks left.”

    “What am i supposed to do?”

    “Let him live everyday like it’s his last.”

 

 

_Its been a helter skelter romance from the start_

_Take these memories, that are haunting me_

_Of a paper man cut into shreds_

_By his own pair of scissors_

_He’s never forgiven this broken heart of mine._

“Because days come and go, But my feelings for you are forever…” Kiyarah sang, running her hands across my head. “One last kiss, before you go. I’ll dry my tears. Because it is time. To let you go.” She began to sob, as did I.

“Can we go to the beach?” I croaked softly, inhaling painfully. I looked at my shaking hand, pale, fingernails yellow and cracking, my nail bed a sickening purple color.

“Of course 

 

Chapter 10:

Waves crashed the beach, she placed a soft towel on the damp, warm sand. I pulled my tank and slowly descended down into a seated position on the sand, flinching in agony with the pain of my weakened joints. I Looked to Kiyarah, who sat beside me and took my hand.

“Remember the song you sung me while i was in a coma?” I asked her weakly.

“Yes?” I cleared my throat and took a large gulp of water.

“Now turn away. Coz i’m awful just to see.” And she began to sing with me.

“All my hair’s abandoned all my body oh my agony. Just know that I will never marry, baby i’m just soggy from the chemo.” By now i was laying on my side, breathing gently, she continued to sing.

“I’m just counting down the days to go, this just ain’t living.”

“I love you.” I whispered as i shut my eyes. Entering an eternal rest.

“Joshua?” She whimpered, turning to my lifeless body. She hugged me tight as i stood beside her and i leaned over to her ear and whispered.

“I love you.” Into her ear. And we sat on the beach.

 

Watching the beach sunset.

“Miss Darling!” Kiyarah shouted, throwing open the front door.

“What? What? Wheres Joshua?!” Misses Darling shouted, running into the entry room.

Kiyarah began sobbing and Mr and Mrs Darling piled into her eight seater as well as Alexx and Jake. “We went to the beach.” Kiyarah started, smiling as she looked at Joshua who was seated on the center console. “Hi Kiki.” He smiled warmly. His brown hair was perfect, untouched by the A/C’s breeze. She beamed back. “Hi.” She whispered.

“Uh, hi?” Alexx said, looking at her questionably.

Kiyarah groaned as Josh patted her back. “I was talking to Josh.” She said quickly, looking out of the windshield in the dead of night to navigate the beach they stayed at for the day. “The fuck?” Jake said from the back seat. Kiyarah shook her head, “Nevermind guys.” “This isn’t funny Kiyarah.” Mrs. Darling said, sobbing from the third row seating.

“I didn’t say it was now did i?” Kiyarah snapped.

“No! But why would you say you were talking to someone who’s dead?!” She shouted, wiping her nose with a tissue. Continuing to sob.

“We’re here.” Kiyarah said rudely, slamming her door.

“Hey, hey, it’ll be okay. I’m right here.”

Josh said, holding her shoulders and kissing her cheek.

“Yea, i know babe, Let’s talk later but stay next to me please.” She said quietly.

“What are you some fucking lunatic?” Alexx said, annoyed while Jake groaned next to him with his arms crossed. “Sure, whatever floats your fucking boat.” Kiyarah said sternly. “Oh my God !” Mrs. Darling shouted, falling to her knees. Postmortem fluids filled crevices between his body and the folds of the towel. Blood dried onto his face and filling the center part of the oxygen tube. His tank sat two feet away, empty. Kiyarah buried her head into Josh’s chest, turning her face away from his body.

“It’s okay, i’m still here. And i’ll never leave you again.”

“What are you doing?” Jake asked, poking her side curiously “I’m...just...so sad he’s gone.” She said, letting a weak tear stream down her left cheek. Josh wiped her tear. But All Jake saw was it almost instantly dry up. She smiled weakly as Jake stared at her, confused

 

“Never thought i’d be attending my own funeral.” Josh said, sitting next to Kiyarah. She wore a black dress with a single stripe of red on the side hem. The dress fit tightly, almost like the fit of a pencil dress. Her hair was braided And pulled into a tight, clean bun at the top of her head. She giggled, patting her wet eyes gently, to be sure not to smudge her makeup.

“You look beautiful.” He told her as the priest entered the room.

“Thank you.” She whispered. “Shhhh!” The person beside her shouted.

“Shure.” She said sarcastically to the woman. It was Susan McColloch, Alexx’s mother. Kiyarah frowned.

“I never liked her much either.” Josh told her. She turned to him and nodded, “I’m pretty sure i’m not liking her.” she said quietly. Susan grabbed the back of Kiyarah’s dress. “Now listen here girl.” She started, pulling her back. “I don’t know who you’re talking to, you look like a crazed lunatic but for the sake of my nephew could you just shut up?” Kiyarah gulped. “If he doesn’t speak then i won’t either.” “If who doesn’t speak?” “Josh.” “JOSH IS DEAD DON’T YOU UNDERSTAND?” Susan shouted, standing up. By now the room was staring at Susan and Kiyarah. She gulped loudly, gazing up at the infuriated woman.

“I know he’s dead. But he isn’t gone.” She told Susan.

“When you die. YOU’RE GONE. You go to heaven!” Susan screamed.

“Susan, sit down.” Kevin instructed his wife. “You’ve caused a scene. She’s in mourning, and denial. Let her believe what she wants to.” She did as she was told and Kiyarah turned back to Josh who followed her gaze. He wrapped his arms around her middle and kissed her temple.

“Shhhh…” He said calmly as the pastor continued his speech. Then the family spoke. His mom, dad, Alexx, Susan, Kevin, his grandma and then Kiyarah. Josh stood next to her at the podium. Helping her along with her speech. “And he also says he misses you all.” She added, per his request. “Who do you think you are!?” Someone from the pews shouted. “Just his girlfriend.” “You mean ex? He’s fucking dead you lunatic!”

“I’m dead but not gone!” Josh shouted into the microphone. She gazed at him in amazement. All the audience heard was the static and squealing in the microphone. They covered their ears, shouting at her to leave the stage, to leave the reception. Josh placed his hands on the sides of her head and buried his head in her back sighing. “I’m sorry.” He whispered. “It’s ok.” She replied exiting the stage. She attempted to return to her seat. She attempted to find another seat. The only thing possible for her to do was exit the glass doors and not look back. In an instant after she shut the door they were locked and the blinds drawn. Her phone chimed. Don’t come back around. -Joie Darling She picked up a chunk of the cracking sidewalk, chucking it at the glass entrance. It shattered the window. She stood there, owning her violent action. “Kiki, dude, run.” “I’m not running.” If i can see you then they should be able to.” “They aren’t like you. They can’t see the light.” “If they think they’re so holy they should see the light just fine.” “But to see the light is the work of Lucifer, Kiyarah.” “I don’t care. They can’t just believe in god THEY HAVE TO SEE THE DEVIL!” She shouted, grabbing another stone and throwing it into the pre-weakened window. Chapter 3: “No baby, stop!” He held fast to her arm, preparing to throw another rock through the entrance. The high priest ran out of the church doors. “What have you done! You have destroyed a place of worship! I am calling the police! I’ll have you arrested, you crazy girl!” “Why can’t you see him!? He’s right next to me!” She yelled, falling to the floor, slamming her fists against the pavement, crying. “He is not with you my child, he is with the holy father himself.” “No he isn’t you fire-spitting liar! He’s next to me! WHY CAN’T YOU JUST LOOK?” “I’m calling for help, just stay there.” The priest said, a crowd beginning to form around him as people piled out of the building.

“Josh.”

“What?”

“Take these.” She said, handing him a box of matches.

“Hang on.” He told her, turning his head to the forestry behind them.

“Babe, am i the only ghost you can see?”

“I don’t know.”

“Well it’s Tyler.”

“Quinn?”

“Yea.”

“Hey. Is that Kiyarah?” Tyler said gloomily. Turning to face Josh. Kiyarah stood, in shock with her ability to see the both of them.

“Why is she looking at me like that?” He asked. “Well for starters, she can see you, and yes, this is Kiyarah.” “Hi.” He said giving a weak smile. She stood staring at his features. Pale skin just like Josh, his height not possibly exceeding five-foot four. He had messy brown hair, untouched by the breeze and sea blue eyes. He had a wide set, muscular body much like a running back football player.

“Hey.” She said slowly. “I’m dead, not stupid.” Tyler said frowning and shoving his hands into his pockets. The three turned as sirens came blaring from the other side of the parking lot.

“No! No! Let me go!” She shouted as she thrashed about in attempt to escape the grip of the sinewy security guards.

She could feel their fingers sink into her triceps as she flung her body from one side to the other.

“AAAAH! I’M NOT CRAZY! I’M NOT A LUNATIC! I CAN SEE THEM, THEY’RE RIGHT THERE!” She screamed as they threw her into the back of the truck and slammed the doors shut as Tyler and Josh boarded into the back with her. Her face was red as tears streamed down her face. She lifted her arms, using her cuffed hands to wipe her face as best as she could. Josh looked at her and began to make funny faces, doing his best to make her laugh. She giggled, sniffled, between her sobs and screams of not being crazy. Tyler sat next to Josh, staring into space, his eyes welled up and his hands clasped together. Josh began cracking jokes, trying his best. Tyler cackled as they hit a bump, sending Josh to the wall. “Ow, shit!” He yelped, rubbing his arm. Kiyarah leaned forward, laughing hysterically as the security guards opened the door. They stared at her laughing form as she spoke to what looks like the air. “That was funny Josh, don’t you agree Tyler?” Tyler nodded, his face still sullen. Josh stared at the officers as two men in white uniforms materialized next to the guards. “Come here you nutcase.” One of them said as they both clambered into the back of the truck. One of them bent down, their rear facing Josh. He cackled. “Oh i’ve always wanted a fat ass in my face.” He said sarcastically, sending her into another fit of laughter. The man wrapped his arms around her body, preventing her from flailing. This was when her laughter was interrupted.

 

Kiyarah shrieked at the top of her lungs and shouted. “Let me go! LET ME GO I’M A NORMAL PERSON!” The men in white chuckled as they held her thrashing body tightly. “JOSH! TYLER!” She screamed as they ran to her side. She was thrown into a concrete room, stripped down to nothing and showered down by a high powered hose that made her skin burn. She stood there, shaking. A powder was thrown onto her and her skin began to tingle from the cold and the chemicals in the powder. She coughed heavily and Josh wiped the powder around her mouth away. He kissed her. At the sound the worker turned back on the hose full force and blasted the powder off of her. She began cackling, so confused, so cold and so afraid.

“Babe, they’re going to put you into a straightjacket. Calm down.”

“I DON’T CARE I DON’T CARE!” she shouted, still laughing hysterically. Belts buckled, wrapped around her body. A rough, white cloth encased her, arms wrapped in front of her body. She shuddered and began to scream. As a mask was put over her face, allowing her mouth to only slightly open to breathe.

“Josh.” She said as best as she could, her voice quivering.

“Baby it’s not going to get better from here.” She began to laugh so hard she was snorting, her laugh so intense it was fading in and out.

“Hehehehehe! I know I know, i’m going to die in here! hahahaha-HA-HA-HA-HA!”

“Kiki...why are you laughing?” “HA-HA-HA I’M GOING TO DIE IN HERE JOSHIE!”

“Why is that funny?” Josh and Tyler stared at her, extremely puzzled.

“I’ll be with YOU!” She shouted, snickering and shaking her head.

“God you lunatic…” The man pushing her down the hall shouted. Kiyanah smiled, looking at all of the steel cell doors, cement walls and filthy cement floor. Instantly, her mood changed. She began thrashing again.

“WHY AM I HERE? TAKE ME HOME I DON’T WANNA BE ALONE I JUST WANT MY CAT AND I WANT MY BED AND MY FAMILY PLEASE TAKE ME HOME!” She sobbed and tilted her head down. “Well,” The man in white began.

“You defaced church property, speaking about dead people and the devil.”

“I make plenty of seNSE IF YOU LISTEN!”

“No, you’re crazy.”

“I am not crazy, you’re just an asshole pushing me down a hallway”

“Stop insulting the man.” Josh instructed her. She nodded.

“Okay Joshie.” The man shook his head.

“Oh, here we go, block seventeen.” He said with a sense of false sadness and sarcasm. Kiyarah whined.

“I trust you won’t make a break.”

He said taking off her mask..

“Run.” Tyler said.

R-U-N, Josh mouthed. She nodded.

“Let’s get these belts off of you.” He grunted. As he leaned over she huffed. He undid the last clasp and she leaned over and bit his arm as hard as she could. Blood spilled from the wound as she slipped out of the jacket and bounded down the hall hastily.

“GET BACK HERE!” He shouted, calling over his radio for backup near block seventeen. Within moments there were men in white coming from every angle. “Run through them.” Joshua instructed, prepared to shove past them as well. Kiyarah scoffed.

“Baby you can’t run past them.” She laughed.

“Hey, remember the time we were singing and i tried to hit the high note?” Josh laughed. She began snickering.

“Yea i do” She laughed.

“How about the time i ran into a wall coz when i went to stop running and slid?” Kiyarah cackled.

“HA-HA-HA-HA!” She laughed, doubling over and falling to the floor laughing. “Get her!” One of the men in white shouted. “What? No!” She quickly got up and ran...directly into one of them. She gulped loudly and sighed.

“Josh...help.” She whined

“Your imaginary friends aren’t going to help you.” “WHAT DO YOU KNOW!” She screamed, clawing at the man's arm, biting and flailing.

“Stop your crazed things you wierdo!” The younger guard shouted at her.

“I’M NOT CR-R-AZY!” She struggled as the man holding her placed a grip onto her throat. She began gasping as he threw her into her cell and locked the door. Kiyanah began sobbing, Josh holding her waist, laying on her shoulder.

“I don’t want to be here Joshie. Do you and Tyler have anymore ideas?” He shook his head and Tyler did the same.

“How about getting into a relationship, going all in and getting lied to and cheated on.” Tyler said monotonically, staring into space. Josh shook his head. “Bro, now is not the time.” He said, still shaking his head.

“How is he doing?” Tyler asked. She looked over to him and cocked her head to the side, confused.

“Oh yea, Alexx.”

“Yea.” Tyler replied, sliding down the cold cement wall. “He seems pretty happy, i mean, i haven’t really payed attention. I think he went back to Arizona with Jake.” Tyler looked down and began letting tears fall from his eyes.

“The pain in your mind doesn’t fade even after you cross over does it?” She asked Tyler, walking over to him with the intent of comforting him.

“Go away, no it doesn’t.” He said firmly. Kiyarah looked at him, full of rage. “You know what?” She said standing up.

“What.” Tyler said monotonically.

“You go away.”

“No.” He said rudely, standing up and getting in her face.

“GO AWAY GO AWAY GO AWAY!” She shouted in his face. Tyler walked backwards and dissipated into the air, tears streaming down his face. Knowing that once again he wasn’t wanted around. Kiyarah slammed her face into the wall. Because she was feeling rather numb.

“Kiyarah, KIKI, STOP!” Josh wailed, throwing himself at her but falling through the wall. Kiyarah slid down the wall, dragging her nails down, having no response as they bent backwards and began to bleed. She ran her fingers through her hair, spreading the blood. She brought her head up to the ceiling and screamed.

“LET ME GO HOME!” Blood seeped to her scalp, through the gown she was wearing and to the palms of her hands. She stared as she began to scream, slamming her fists to the floor until they were raw and ached. The skin thinned and tore open as she began sobbing and placing her bloodied palms to the floor. “JOSHUAAAAAAA! JOSHUA COME BACK!”

 

“Kiki.” “Kiyarah.” “Kiyarah, wake up.” Josh said, leaning over Kiyarah. Her vision was fogged but began to focus, she was in a white room, having only a bed, and a single lavatory setup. A man in white stood next to Josh, shining a light into her eyes. Kiyarah began to squirm, attempting to sit up, but shortly realized she was wearing it again. “AHHHHHHHHH LET ME GO!” She screamed. Josh hushed her, placing his hand over her mouth. She began breathing heavily, biting her lips as the man continued to check her vitals. She screamed again as he poked her arm for a blood sample, she bit down on her lip harder, making it bleed.

“Nah, stop that.” He mumbled.

“Stop poking me yOU PRICK!” She shouted ruefully. He gazed at her in shock with her words.

“Excuse me?”

“I said, stop poking me, you fucking cunt.” She glared at him, Josh stared at the two of them.

“Piece of shit.” She muttered to Josh as the man walked out of the room, shutting the door and locking it multiple times. He shook his head.

“Where am I Joshie?”

“51/50 ward.”

“WHAT?”

“You were labeled as a danger to yourself and others. Now you’re in a padded room. They found you passed out in a pool of your own blood. You bent your fingernails back, you bit into the veins of your wrists. You wrote ‘get me out of here’ on the wall. In blood.” She shook, pulling her lips taught as she muffled her cries, she squeezed her eyes shut and doubled over on the bed. She began to gag, her stomach heaved and ached.

“How long have i been here Josh?”

“Two days now.”

“I need food.” He nodded in agreement. She padded over to the door and leaned into the small, barred opening. A guard stood outside of her Door,

“Pst, hey buddy, i need some food.” She said as kindly as she could. He shrugged and murmured to himself. “HEY! I’M HUNGRY!” She shouted into his ear. He stood unfazed by her yelling and spoke over the radio intercom.

“Hey, 51/50, room two needs a bite, she hasn’t eaten for a while.”

“What is this?” She asked Josh and herself, disgusted. She poked the grey colored blob. It smelled highly unpleasant and made a sickening suction sound when she pulled the fork from its position.

“I think… I think It’s...meatloaf?” Josh answered, also disgusted. Kiyarah pinched her nose and took a bite, gagging on the soggy and malodorous substance. “Nonono.” She shouted, running to the toilet, heaving what she swallowed into the metallic bowl. She shoved the food outside of the slit in the door muttering about how the food was inedible.

 

 

Kiyara pulled her arms to the contour of her exposed ribcage. Laughing about a memory of her and Josh but then began sobbing. Josh had crossed over. So did Tyler. She cried hysterically, screaming nonsense into the void. Her words were not understandable. She was left neglected in the cell, to her own devices. Her mind.

“AAAAAIIIIEEEE!” She shrieked, the guard has left her door. The recording systems taken from her room, given to someone else. They figured she’d be done for soon enough. Her face fell into her hand, her mind churning. Her blood boiling. Her stomach aching. She ran her fingers across her chapped lips, her once beautiful face, pale and sickening. Her once bright and lively eyes, no longer up to the fight. Her hands, once so inviting and warm, a pale blue color, her nails yellow and cracking. She flopped onto her back, her torn shirt revealing the bones. Her body was skin and bones. Her hips protruded, her femurs withheld no thickness. Her patellas were only tightly bound by a thin layer of pale flesh. “Take me.” The only audible words since he left, she lay in bed, on the floor, sitting against the wall; broken. Her self-created wounds left to rot and her being left to wither away, beginning with her soul. “Release me.” She whispered to Azrael. And with a single kiss… She was gone.


End file.
